The dictators of political correctness decree that we must all constantly, seriously, respectfully – nay, reverently – contemplate every imaginable variety of sexual abnormality.

It’s not enough for you to say that you are unconcerned what other people choose to do to derive their sexual pleasures as long as they don’t affect you in any way you do not choose, and then to dismiss the subject from your thoughts and speech. No. You must listen attentively to what is said about the perverse practices, read about them, think about them The topic is called LGBQT. For short! There are now said to be over a hundred recognized deviant preferences, each accorded a revered initial.

The demand for homage to the topic has become so persistent, so incessant, it amounts to a cult, an ideology, a form of religion. As such it needs an -ism on the end of it. So we contribute the coinage ELGEBEECUTYISM, which we pronounce with stresses on the EL and the CU thus: El-ge-bee cu-ty-ism.

And there is another new instruction recently issued by the dictators and not yet named. It concerns the height of the individual you may date to be politically correct, depending on your own height.

Breitbart reports:

A former vice chancellor at the University of Missouri argued in a deposition that it can be sexual harassment if a tall man asks a short woman out on a date. …

A former vice chancellor at the University of Missouri argued during depositions for a campus sexual assault case that it could be considered sexual assault for a tall male student to ask a short female student out on a date.

Vice Chancellor of Student Affairs Cathy Scroggs, who resigned from the university in 2017, argued that the alleged perpetrator had committed harassment simply as a result of his “power over” the female student. The power the alleged perpetrator had, according to Scroggs, came from nothing more than his physical size.

So, HEIGHTISM has arrived. Unlike most of the -isms dear to the hearts of the dictators, it is not a term of abuse like “racism”, “sexism”, “colonialism”, “imperialism”. Rather, as with elgebeecutyism, it is an -ism to be embraced and heeded. If you are a tall man, refrain from dating a short woman.

We have yet to be informed whether tall women may date short men. Or which of the elgebeecutyist genders must apply heightist restrictions to their own dating plans. But be sure to check with the dictators before you make that date.